I happened to read somewhere,
Marriage can give one the deepest, happiest moments of life. And that's one of the reasons God created it. It was part of God's "Happiness Plan."
Oh, Really? “Happiness Plan”? Are you kidding me? You have to be here to know the actually nauseous pain and suffering caused by Love, marriage and the whole baggage that comes with it.
Now that I’ve blurted out my gyan, let me give you some deep insights into my “love-life” (grinning are you? Wait till I get to the good part)
Anyone who knows me, will also know I am committed to Boxer from as-long-as-I-can-remember. And not to add, anyone, I emphasize “a-n-y-o-n-e” who knows me, also knows Boxer and his dil-se-dil-ka connection with me. His family (including his dog I gifted), School teachers, schoolmates, my neighbors, his neighbors, sabziwala’s near my house, college bus driver, my college principle, lecturers, college mates, all my relatives, all his relatives (ok, hope you are getting the point here, every soul who knows me, knows Boxer) and in all this melee I never realized over 12 odd years that my parents had no idea!! Now for the “Meet-the-parents” (Not Boxer, you guys, my so-called-readers) my parents belong to the sitting-the-fence category. They are super chilled about their daughter staying out late, enjoying, wearing what she wants, no restrictions blah blah, but when the topic of “love- marriage” is broached (imagine thunder and lightning!) they are all up in arms against it! Phew! There you go, you thought our love story was all hunky-dory!
The story until now:
K: Me, Boxer, MOB: Mother of Bride, FOB: Father of Bride, BOB: Brother of Bride, FOG: Father of Groom, MOG: Mother of Groom, SOG: Sister of Groom, FOBF: Father of Bride’s Friend, Shwe: K’s Friend
(*Screen goes up*)
K goes off on a gala trip for 2 yrs to do a residential MBA. Boxer is in Google-Hyderabad playing around for those 2 yrs. Now all this while, no one knows that K’s parents are jumping with joy that their super pampered daughter is actually fending for herself, turning over a new leaf and basically getting all ready for the big “Gowda” wedding! (Ha ha ha ha ha, sorry I couldn’t help laughing!) K meanwhile is waiting for Boxer to relocate to Bangalore (which he did and I am sooooooooo happy he did). Once Boxer comes back to Bangalore, K is all overjoyed. Happy times are back again. So K and Boxer are all happy living and loving in their own lil’ world. Road trips, shopping, vacations…
Do you all have smiles on your faces thinking of the happy couple?
Enter the MOB (in the voice of “Enter the dragon”)
One fateful day K leaves an IPod full of photographs at home. The very very suspicious MOB checks it and finds loads and loads of pictures of K and Boxer! The cat is out of the bag! And believe me the MOB does not like the Cat! She wants to actually squash the cat under her feet! Unsuspecting K returns home after meeting Boxer that evening (*blush*) and there it is! The 12 year developed bomb has finally been dropped!
You think K was scared and upset? No! K was amazingly happy!! The IPod did the difficult bit “Telling the parents”!! Now for the detailing, FOB takes K to the terrace to apparently talk her out of it. (Yeah dad, your 1 hr of gyan will brainwash my 12 yrs of love conditioned brain! Try me) FOB gives up the gyan bit. He then decides to take matters into his hands.
Now for the cruel planning of MOB and FOB: To marry K off to some “rich” filthy, bloody chappal-with-formal-pants wearing Gowda! (Ha ha ha ha, sorry I couldn’t help it again) FOB thinks if K happens to “meet” atleast one wannabe Gowda, she will change her mind. K thinks if FOB happens to meet Boxer atleast once, he may atleast try changing his mind.
Now, enter FOBF.
(Background: Shwe is a dear dear friend. Who’s parents are totally liberal and don’t mind her marrying anyone. The only condition being he should be a guy. That loser anyway has chosen the “arranged marriage” route. That’s a different story altogether. Now Shwe’s dad (FOBF) and K’s dad are great friends)
FOB now takes the help of FOBF to brainwash K. He coaxes FOBF to have a "personal” talk with K to talk her out of marrying Boxer.
FOBF meets K. K manages to convince FOBF about Boxer (it dint take much effort). Now FOBF tries to convince FOB about boxer. FOB is enraged! (so predictable dad!) he decides to take matters into his own hands now (the matter keeps slipping away from his hands you see) FOB has chosen some rich Gawar Gowda (let’s call him GG) to come home and see K in a week! (That will be another hilarious post!) Boxer is eagerly waiting for GG to plan to come to see me. No no, this time Boxer won’t be whacking the shit of out anyone, he wants to see K do it ;) ha ha ha!
That’s it for Marry-Go-Round-1 folks. Round 2, next week…
Till then pray K’s household retains its sanity!
P.S: MOB is the hero (anti-hero) of this story, but all this is happening behind her back. She has no idea. When she does, well… (Thunder and lightning!)
Disclaimer: My colleague who proof read this said I sound like “parent-hater” NO I AM NOT!! I love my parents, A LOT. Just that I love Boxer too. Iss ishq ka dard zara samjha karo.. papi duniya!